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How do you capture moments and feelings of happiness?

This is a major problem for me. When something good happens, it doesn't affect me at all in the there and now.
This is despite the fact I KNOW a moment is nice/happy...it already feels like its passing/out of reach

>i.e. a few days ago I beat my friend at chess (I never win and have played against him many times), yet I'm sitting there feeling...nothing, even though I know the meaning behind that win

Instead, happiness comes to me later. I look back 6 months or longer, and my mind has filtered out the bad times (not always but often), so I'm left with nostalgia and a feeling that everything has passed and my present/future is trending downhill.
>i.e. I get periods of depression every few months that, for days make me dysfunctional/super stressed, but are near-irrelevant in memory

So how am I supposed to extract good feelings when only bad feelings are blunt when they happen?


Good question. I think the key is looking forward to something, when you look forward to something you are happy when and as its happening unless it ends up being dissapointing. Has it maybe been awhile since you had something to look forward to? Also maybe consider that as time goes on we see and experience worse and worse soykaf. So maybe its not so much that looking back the bad soykaf doesnt stick but more that its comparably smaller to the bad soykaf happening at the moment. Perhaps you are on a downward trend at the moment, or maybe you need to think back to your worst moments again to put things in perspective. When youve hit your worst you will look back on it as your worst still and be glad you arent there. Though things are very bad and difficult now, I vividly remember middle school being my worst time of my life and im glad im passed it.

If you really are going downhill, just hope that maybe tomorrow will be better. If you dont have anything to look forward to try and look forward to the small stuff. Laying your head down and drifting off to sleep is always very peaceful, and even if sitting in your bed alone isnt; the moment you do sleep is. Again little things.


Are you depressed? Depression makes you unable to be happy.


Writing. Painting. Composing music.
Those are the ways that humans have created to preserve parts of themselves. I would advice against preserving memories, though. Simply enjoy the moments you go through, senses can't accurately represent what we feel, and that might leave you frustrated (hobbies are always nice, though. We all need to express ourselves, and that is good for you and everyone else).
Still, if you can't enjoy what you identify as happy, you either might want to consider talking to a therapist, or the constructs of "joy" you have inside your head are not yours.
Therapy always helps, nonetheless.


I don't know about you OP, but I find that I tend to enjoy things retrospectively; the best example I can think of is when you watch a film, but you only piece together little details or bits of information after you've watched it.


Set your expectations really low so that every small little thing that happens to go well is fuarrrking amazing.