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lainchan archive - /feels/ - 10852

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Tell me about a time you made a big change in your life. Did you drop out of college, or go back after many years, move to a different city or country? Why did you do it? What did you expect to happen? What actually happened?

I have many years of youth ahead of me, I'm graduating from college very soon, and I still don't know what to do with the rest of my life. I wonder if I just need something to kick my ass and make my life more interesting. But I can't tell to what extent this is just "the grass is always greener".


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So comfy no matter how old
Couldn't squeak much more when I fall
Forever asleep in your arms
Nothing really mattress!

Drop out of college: check
Go back after many years (2,5): application already sent, with an Abitur as good as mine I am basically guaranteed to get in
Move to different place: nope. although new uni.
>Why did you do it
I did the first semester twice. The first time around I fell for the "go to bed late, wake up late" cycle, mostly fueled by loud roommates and moba games I just got into (roommates). But unlike them, I wasn't studying my ass of before exams, just rode this bleak winter mood. I assumed it was the same one-year bleakness that hit me during high school and got me a year late, so I took the spring semester off and tried again next year. I attended class, but spent the rest of the time in my dorm room. No vidya, no friends, no party, no study, nothing. Not depressed either, just unmotivated. Around New Years's I started wondering why I was there in the first place, so I just stopped before it turns into a debt.
>What did you expect to happen?
That my newly acquired Texhnolyze feels will carry me into glorious labor paired with no fuarrrks given; and perhaps that if I don't like that, it will motivate me for a serious attempt at uni.
>What actually happened?
Turns out companies don't really go out their way to employ you when you give no fuarrrks. Ended up learning a trade just to not sit at home (gov't paid for the course + about half of minimum wage to me), and worked one summer in an unrelated job.

I don't suppose any advice I have would be useful. Life's weird, but nice. Cheers!


i've got married and have two kids now. sure, sometimes i wish back my old life as a half nomadic /cyb/ but on the long run it was a good choice. i love my wife and my kids even more and i can teach them all the great things i had to figure out by myself and prepare them to go their own ways some day.


I got back to college after a two years break. I'm struggling with new subjects since I barely remember the old ones. I'm a aerospace engineering undergraduate.


same here i grad in physics next quarter. the first year back was difficult but now I feel like I'm competent.


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I dropped out of school with the lowest possible degree. Thanks to new laws in my state I can't even get back to school.
This happened 5 years ago, I've been NEETing with the occasional job since.
Thanks to that I can't really take up any jobs I'd like to do, and I'm living comfortably enough not to go for any slave position.

>Why did you do it?

I had a bad depression and the teachers did not really warn me I'd drop out, neither did I care much.

Hello, fellow german Lainon! How are you doing?


What did you do to get back on track?



just got better w/ time never been a good/disciplined student or anything


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I don't know if you can call it a radical change.

For the longest time I've noticed that a lot of factions share the same specific flaw. A lot of explanations I've read either failed to acknowledge this flaw, or worse, say the other side had it and that their side didn't. It wasn't anything that was exclusive to any group of any background, political faction, sex, race, etc.

I knew there was something there but I couldn't really identify what it was. It was going to be one of those things that was going to be obvious in retrospect, but for a multitude of reasons I just couldn't really see what it was.

I finally figured it out. It's entitlement. Everyone and everybody has a sense of entitlement. That's not necessary a bad thing, because I believe that there are some things that we should be entitled to like basic rights in a civilized society, but having too much of a sense of entitlement just does more harm than good.

I sometimes think I don't have a sense of entitlement, and I'm not saying that as a compliment, if anything the opposite. I tend to give up too easily on things I want and just love being in my comfort zone no matter the cost. It wouldn't hurt me to be a bit more entitled now and then.

But still, I feel like I understand a bit more why there's so much conflict. So many people feel so entitled they're unwilling to listen to others and they not only end up destroying others but themselves as well. It's not the only factor obviously.

Combined with this and my recent rediscovery of deism I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something, which is ironic considering the nature of deism. Something which has disturbed me for years has finally been solved, and I feel a lot more free to concentrate on other important things now. So it's more like a start of a radical change for me, or something.


I'm not actually german, but Abitur describes the thing perfectly (I'm almost certain that schools here adopted the whole thing from Austria), while I'm uncertain which if any of the 3 / 4 letter things in english speaking countries matches it.



fuarrrked up my last year of highschool corrected my mistakes in the next year, afterwards went to uni graduated with a degree in a field I didn't like and soykaf marks.

Lived as a neet for a few months: I'm working now.

I've decided that I'm either going to go back to university for a computer related discipline after upgrading some old courses. Or I'm going to go ahead and get certified for a whole bunch of computer related stuff. Either way the road ahead is long and arduous.

But for the first time I feel like I'm on the right path towards my end goal, which is 1. Getting my greencard 2. Working for myself in a field that I enjoy.

To op I'd probably say that you'll know when you're on the right path. You'll sorta feel it. I'm a superstitious person and I saw a double rainbow a while ago, felt like a covenant or a promise that if I kept working at it things would be much better than they had ever been before. I'm really starting to feel that way at least. Wish me luck Lains.


i moved alone to a different state when i was 20 to study engineering, i did it because i was studying Chemistry and there was a guy from another state, i wasn't happy with chemistry because i was losing 3~4 hours of my day inside a bus
also one day two guys pointed a gun at my bus and i felt really scared

and then my grades on the national exam were terrible, and the only way i could get out of chemistry was moving out to the countryside...

i wasn't expecting much things, i avoided any deep thought until i waved goodbye to my family

i'm 23 now, and there were pros and cons, many many many things happened in this 3 years (i'm not even studying engineering anymore, now i'm studying CS)...
my english knowledge is starting to fail on me to explain succinctly all that happened...
the most important thing was that for the entire 2016 i was depressed, i had no friends, no direction in life, no reasons to wake up, zero confidence, self esteem and will power... i failed at like 75% of all classes last year and the sadness i felt was so overwhelming that it kinda gave me back to life...
now i'm starting to get better, i'm starting to see the bright side of things again, my main focus in life is never feel that way again


Around 2006 I got married and joined the Marines. Both huge changes. Marines changed my life, not necessarily in a good way. I'm a lot more hard-edged now, barely functional for the civilian lifestyle. But, I can get a lot of soykaf done very efficiently. I know how to push the limits. I'm just not likable.

A couple years in I had my first kid and went to the Iraq right after. I missed the first year of his life - he turned 1 right after I came back. To this day, our relationship is still a lot different than with my other kids. I was home for those kids, and I think it made a huge difference.
After the Marines I got a job at a software company. I'm not a programmer but I've studied my ass off for 4 years to try to become one, and it still hasn't paid off for me. Job is pretty much soykaf, being an old vet with PTSD doesn't really help you get along with other people. I'm apparently a huge asshole.
So...don't join the Marines, I guess. Made a huge difference in my life but not necessarily for the better.
Don't have kids either. I love mine but I'm not sure I'm suited to be a father.


When I was 21 I applied to a job 16 hours away from my home, I drove up for the interview, and I accepted the job offer via email on the drive back home. I didn't tell anyone, not my friends, not my parents until I had secured a place to live in the other state. I told everyone at once one week before I started work. Everyone called me crazy, blah blah, said I wouldn't make it, that it was dumb. I didn't listen, I left, I have gone back 3 times in three years, never for longer then a week. Best decision of my life.


After graduating college and working a soykaf job (aka- more or less my dream job) for a couple years, I quit, started my own business, and married my girlfriend.

M business failed utterly financially, but ultimately it was the only way I found to sanity. I drank a lot less, smiled a lot more, and got along ok so far. Now I have a different job, where I make less money and go outside a little more. I'm no longer depressed, though maybe not all the way ok yet.


What kind of business was it?

Any suggestions and hints?