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lainchan archive - /r/ - 28081



File: 1480452707282.png (54.11 KB, 300x229, pancakeshimakaze.jpg)

No.28081

If you were legit immortal as in not aging and invulnerable to bullets, what would you do in the first few centuries before apathy overcame you?

Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?

  No.28082

>>28081
I'd try to figure out as much of math and physics as I could.

Then I'd wander around the universe, fulfilling my role as an apparently infinite source of entropy which will stave off heat-death until the Big Rip.

  No.28083

Rule the known universe with an iron fist. Why hide it?

  No.28084

>>28081
>Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?

the nice part of being completely immortal is that you will outlive any government and all members of the public, so it really doesn't matter if you hide it. If you're captured and experimented on or whatever you can just wait it out and have a nice story to tell afterwards. Within a few generations people just won't care.

  No.28085

Learn all the things I've ever wanted to learn but not had the time. Maths and martial arts would be pretty high on the list. I'd probably just watch fuarrrk tons of anime.

  No.28089

>>28081
>If you were legit immortal as in not aging and invulnerable to bullets, what would you do in the first few centuries before apathy overcame you?
I would amuse myself by scaring people. I would join the military and use this to work my way up the government chain. I would make certain old military images would leak through so people would speculate about it as people do with other politicians now.

>Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?

I'd do so halfheartedly and without lying. I figure most people would rationalize it anyways. It would be funny to pretend to die and pop up somewhere else looking almost exactly the same and then remark about how that's surely such a coincidence that someone thinks it's strange.

If someone asked me as a politician, I would joke about it and then ignore further questions about it. I imagine a cult would eventually form and that would be fun.

  No.28090

>>28084
It would be pretty boring. Plus they could just lock you forever after they stop experimenting on you. It would be traumatizing to you. And you would have to deal with anti immortality racists.

Anyways I would hide it by changing my name legally every 20 years. I would also keep some underground connections so that once in a while I can change my name illegally, also getting a new birthday.

  No.28091

>>28090
>lock you forever

eventually the concrete will crumble and the steel will rust away. It couldn't be more boring or traumatic than watching the human race succumb to entropy, and you have literally forever to get over it.

  No.28092

I would probably tell it the wrong people before thinking of actually hiding it, or some would learn about it while I was testing the limits myself; and then before I knew it agents would snap me and I'd go into some secret testing facility where they would test the hell out of me; i'd eventually get violent and they'd have to lock me deep underground; I'd become a rumor between high-clearance agents who kind of pity my eternal time underground, but then they would forget or grow old and die or whatever.
If there is a humanity when I'm found I'd likely be some animal like Lucy in Elfen Lied except not at all dangerous, perhaps I'd get a round two. If there was no humanity or machinery by the time I'm out, I'd probably go into a psychosis and dream for the rest of my eternity; or just feel very very bad, a kind of bad I only ever heard in this one track: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iazNmE9_BwE

  No.28096

I'd first study disciplines that would help me blend in and hide my identity, like computer hacking, forgery and disguise, then I'd live off the grid in countries too unorganised to have exact records. I guess I'd study maths and all the sciences and medicines and arts. Try every drug and kind of sex, every sport, game, recreation and martial art, investigate every religion and philosophy, eat every food, read every book, play every musical instrument, speak every language...
I'm sure there'd be plenty to keep me occupied. That whole "world-weary immortal" thing is vastly exaggerated, I'm sure.

I'd squirrel away enough money in Swiss bank accounts, safety deposit boxes, Greyhound lockers, fake walls and buried gold bars that if anything really bugged me I could pull up enough money to found a charity, hire an army, build a laboratory, or whatever was needed to effect change.

  No.28097

>>28081
>If you were legit immortal as in not aging and invulnerable to bullets, what would you do in the first few centuries before apathy overcame you?

I'd plan elaborate pranks where I pretend to be an ancient evil vampire, and wait for various fatass iterations of Dorito van Helsing who've marathoned Buffy episodes too many times to "stumble" onto my "dark secret" and try to slay me.

Each time, I'd pretend to have been defeated by the forces of light, only to point at them and smile and say "Gotcha!" Maybe put on some sunscreen and sunglasses and relax in a beach chair with one of those folding-mirror things if they tried to dust me with sunlight. Or I'd fry up the garlic with some onions and sausages and invite them to lunch. Or pull out a carving knife and whittle little statues out of the stakes they stuck in my chest.

>Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?


Easy. Be homeless. No-one pays any attention to them.

  No.28098

>>28097
this is by far the best answer so far.

  No.28099

File: 1480491498315.png (765.94 KB, 200x113, imomo.gif)

>>28081
>If you were legit immortal as in not aging and invulnerable to bullets, what would you do in the first few centuries before apathy overcame you?

Probably search for other 'immortals' to co-exist with, or just exceptionally interesting humans to pass the time.

>Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?


Identity theft is real, Lain.

  No.28100

When it comes to true immortality, you have to think very long-term, so I would say
- Travel the entire world, doing pretty much >>28096 for a long time.
- Once humanity starts to colonise the Solar System, start travelling between planets.
- Get bored of this or maybe all of humanity starts uploading into some sort of Matrioshka brain so take off and go interstellar, checking out some Goldilocks planets for alien life.
- Find the galactic equivalent of the internet and surf it, learning new things from alien cultures. (There are bound to be aliens out there even older than you, right?)
- Spend eons wandering the galaxy. If you're impervious as well as immortal then you could just meditate for centuries at a time while your body flies raw through the vacuum.
- When you get completely bored and want to end it, throw yourself into a supermassive black hole.

Also, the film Only Lovers Left Alive is on-topic and a really good movie.

  No.28117

If I had all of eternity, I would learn how to create universes if such a thing would be possible given infinite time.
I would repeat every single combination of actions, learn every pattern of movement and life. View existence from every angle. I would play and memorize every single scenario of existence, from the past and future (the present would mean nothing on this magnitude).
After that, there would be nothing left to do, and so I would pick the most amusing universe or combination of verses and repeat it forever.
This would undoubtedly get boring after a few forevers, so I would probably set the universe in a way that repeats, but suppress the memories everything I know, so that I can simply live in the moment, under the illusion that I was mortal. I would re-learn that I am immortal, and repeat the entire cycle over and over again.
The only thing I would not do is let the universe come to an end around me, and be left in a spot where I cannot continue. Even a repetitive melody is more exciting than no melody at all.

  No.28120

>>28100
>throw yourself into a supermassive black hole.

then you just fall into towards the singularity until the black hole evaporates. Might be interesting, but I don't think I'd want to do it twice.

>>28117
>if such a thing would be possible given infinite time.

given that your body is an infinite source of entropy, you definitely could.

  No.28140

File: 1480824146367.png (205.79 KB, 200x200, THERIDENEVERENDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.gif)

> If you were legit immortal as in not aging and invulnerable to bullets, what would you do in the first few centuries before apathy overcame you?

Probably just do what I'm doing now, which is failing to do anything.

> Also, how would you hide your immortality from the general public and the government?


Maybe live a nomadic lifestyle? Work on programming projects as long as that's a thing. A career that won't require much of an identity. Eventually the world would become a good or bad enough place that I wouldn't need to hide it.

  No.28141

I would enjoy Nature.

  No.28147

>>28081
I'd learn everything I can about social engineering and manipulation in general, which should be able to get me out of any situation that would require I hide. I'd probably wander and build up a cult or a following as I go along. I'd also likely augment myself if I could. I'd learn blending in and infiltration skills such as hacking as other lains have said. I would also write and try to come to new conclusions. I would get an entirely different perspective of humanity since at that point I would be basically beyond human.

  No.28150

File: 1481086609914.png (26.44 KB, 200x200, 12728388_1670334019888534_296094395_n.jpg)

>>28117
"Let’s suppose that you were able every night to dream any dream you wanted to dream, and that you could for example have the power within one night to dream 75 years of time, or any length of time you wanted to have.

And you would, naturally, as you began on this adventure of dreams, you would fulfill all your wishes. You would have every kind of pleasure during your sleep. And after several nights of 75 years of total pleasure each you would say “Well that was pretty great”. But now let’s have a surprise, let’s have a dream which isn’t under control, where something is gonna happen to me that I don’t know what it's gonna be.

And you would dig that and would come out of that and you would say “Wow that was a close shave, wasn’t it?”. Then you would get more and more adventurous and you would make further- and further-out gambles what you would dream. And finally, you would dream where you are now. You would dream the dream of living the life that you are actually living today.

That would be within the infinite multiplicity of choices you would have. Of playing that you weren't god, because the whole nature of the godhead, according to this idea, is to play that he is not."

-Alan Watts

  No.28180

It would probably be enough time to find a girlfriend for me, a 24 year old neckbeard. :)

But acquiring skills and knowledge would definitely be the stuff to do at least for the first few centuries. I wonder what kind of a person I would be after 200 years? Probably still not melancholic. Or rather, I am already sometimes melancholic. Well, probably not world weary.

  No.28181

Just invulnerable to bullets, or unkillable in general? Do I get hungry/cold/tired? If I'm in a perfect condition all the time and nothing can harm me, I'd just keep walking in one general direction and sleep whenever and wherever I can, for as long as I can. I'd find something to do along the way. Don't have to worry about missing out if I've got all the time in the world. As long as I keep to less populated areas, I should be fine, no one is going to believe newspapers or internet articles claiming to have found "the invincible man" anyway. As for governments or other vile institutions, it all depends on how much control they will have in the future. Probably going to end up in some super secret prison sooner or later. Other that, I don't really know what I'd do, probably whatever life brings.

If I simply don't age and specifically bullets don't harm me, then it's still better than "normal" life I guess. Would have to earn enough money to fake every death in each next "life" though, which is neither cheap nor easy to succesfully pull off. And each "life" would have to last maybe 10 years max before people start noticing that I'm not physically aging over time.

  No.28182

>>28181
All of it really. Full on immortality. I think you could pull off 20 years if you are in your late teens/early twenties.

  No.28183

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  No.28184

File: 1481368042882.png (300.29 KB, 200x125, -Light-Yagami-light-yagami-32692514-800-500.jpg)

I would become vigilante and start to punish all the criminals around the world. First I'd clean my neighborhood's street from all drug-dealers, murders and burglars then I'd gain experience and level up myself for hunting corrupted politicians and terrorists.
I'd become mankind's lord and savior.

  No.28185

>>28184
Well, first off people wouldn't instantly like you. Even a criminal is someones father, mother, son or daughter. Even the police hates vigilantes, unless all they do is just hand the criminals to the police, and then the criminals can still defend themselves on court. Self righteusness is good until you become a dictator. Nobody likes dictators.

Second of all this is basically a ticket to get yourself into a lab and be experimented on for a very long time. Eventually you would be surrounded by 4 walls of cops, and just because you're immortal, it does not mean that you can phase trough solid objects.

Well other than that it seems like a good way to pass the time in an eternity.

  No.28197

>>28184
What stops new criminals from appearing? Crime is largely a sympton, and usually not a disease.

  No.28206

Everything would simultaneously shrink in significance and grow in danger, since everything will come to pass, all while the immortal's well-being is constantly in imminent danger of the interest of this supernatural state, in consideration of vigilance against insanity and human error. The danger of becoming an indefinite test subject of any party that would compromise their secret; the passing of memory and knowledge; the inability of holding a mortal close in the face of a temporal blink; the confusion and alienation of a constantly changing culture and society... what would an immortal do? Assuming the immortal has otherwise human characteristics, I think an immortal would most likely try its best to completely disconnect from its interaction from the mortal world, with periods of giving in to an existential yearning to a futile quarrel with the strange world he were imprisoned to. How absurd would it be to be immortal, while sharing many of the mortal qualities of man?

  No.28215

Are there any good books on this subject?

  No.28317


  No.28326

There's a pretty good film called The Man from Earth about a guy who is legit immortal and has been around tens of thousands of years. It's done as a verbal story, with this guy telling his story to a collection of friends, as he is moving away. He says that he moves every 10 years when people start to notice he's not aging; changing his name, sometimes even pretending to be his own son. He maintains that it's a fictional concept for a story he's been writing, but his friends start to question his sanity as he takes it really seriously.

It's a very good film. As I said, it's just a few people talking for an hour of screen-time, but it's good. I definitely recommend it.

  No.28333

There's a lot of things to do as a truly immortal being, I guess is like how you feel for the century.
> Walk into a lost tribe in the Amazon and be their God for a while (I guess with time you could become their sexual God).
> Walk (or dive, whatever) into the Marianas for some warm and cozy sleep. Also the perks of seeing some bizarre fish no human has ever seen.
> Some action: be a vigilante and spook the soykaf out some niggas.
> "If you're going to be alive forever, better be in peace with yourself, right?" Climb to some temple up in the Himalayas. Naked.
> Walk into an active volcano, wait for some scientific to go gather some data there and say hello.
> Amass great fortune, buy a castle and live in there without being seen for a couple centuries, spook visitors.
> Cultivate your body to Greek ideals.
> Wonder about glitterboy soykaf. "If I'm invulnerable, can my hair be cut? What about my nails?" This soykaf has tremendous implications: if my hair is invulnerable, it could become the most precious material in the universe.
> Do I really need to poo?
> If humans don't fuarrrk up things, have qt AI to keep you company.
> Read a metric fuarrrkton of things, try to remember some, be the Guardian of Knowledge.
> Is my spermatozoa immortal?
And for the grand finale:
> Bang a chick
> Wait a while
> "Lmao dude I fuarrrked ur grandma"

  No.28334

>>28333
Quality ideas

  No.28589

I certainly think there are some good ideas in this threas, but being immortal would grow old quick how punny.

  No.28590

>>28333
>> Walk (or dive, whatever) into the Marianas for some warm and cozy sleep

marianas is very close to freezing. It would not be comfy.

  No.28591

>>28326
Just saw this thanks for the recomendation lainon. Would recomend others watch as well.
>>28589
It would in some ways, but I think the amount of wisdom one would accumulate would bring something new over time. Also observing history, while it has patterns would be interesting for a long time. Also meeting unique individuals would be interesting for a long time as well.

  No.28628

>>28590
Oops, thought there would be some underwater volcano or something. Talking out of my ass I see.

  No.28639

>>28333
> "Lmao dude I fuarrrked ur grandma"
How many generations would need to pass until it wouldn't be incest anymore? :P

  No.29624

>>28326
That was pretty good watch. Thanks for the recommendation.