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Today I figured out that I'm probably the richest man in the world. I just found my old notebook with 1000 security mnemonic, now I have about a million of btc. I don't really even know what to do.


Donate it to Lainchan by buying everyone lainchan stickers Present Day, Present Time! AHAHAHAHAHA!


What if I'll buy entire lainchan and make it the biggest Lichtensteinian imageboard?


I would strongly suggest that you do it. Make Lainchan strong and powerful, like bear.


I will make everyone loves Lainchan again


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Don't ruin this place :( I feel like it's the only place where I can have discussions with likeminded people.


I won't, lad, I promise you. I'm not even gonna buy it because it's already fine and cosy


you'll just Mansa Musa the economy


Find someone to build a Lain statue.


Please find a way to end capitalism.

I hate it. It turns humans into asocial, self-destroying monsters. I suffer, the enviroment suffers, everything suffers.

Please end this.


donate to free software projects, anon.
If you're for real, convert as much of it as you can into real money, acquire a large enough passive income to live off of without working, do whatever you want with the rest. Probably invest it and use the return to donate to free software projects as said or soykaf like that.
Without having to work, do whatever you like.


one man and alot of money can't do that.
well, maybe if he offers money to anyone looking to start a worker cooperative, I guess that'd help.



I lost 15BTC from back when they were worth barely more than a dollar. Oh how I wish I could recover those...

you could share it with lains


Buying out a company and turning it into a worker cooperative isn't a bad idea.


>tfw soykafhole and i can't even afford a new thinkpad after it broke

congratulations anon, remember not to talk to anyone physical about it. take it easy for a few months and think calmly before attempting to do anything with the dosh

also, multiply your fortune and claim some property on Mars for lainons once it gets colonized


If I were in your case, I would slowly drift from a full-time job (admitting you have one) to a part-time job to some kind of entrepreneur, venture capitalist or patron of the arts.

First, make sure to diversify your wealth: buy some USD, some Gold and Silver (look at Goldmoney.com), other currencies (EUR, GBP, AUD, JPY, CHF), maybe some other cryptcurrencies. I'd also start to consider other ways to invest money like stocks and bonds and physical wealth: land, house, cars, etc...

Once the money is diversified and your career is safe, I would travel a lot to find the place where I would want to buy a house and live for the rest of my life. The traveling part is also necessary to widen your perspective on life. I've done one month alone in Japan, it changed my outlook my life.

I would also pay for some body/mind unity: I'd learn meditation with the best teacher I can find, get the the best massage possibles, start a new sport like Taichi and eat the best possible food. Spoil yourself but try to do it in a healing manner.

Be EXTREMELY CAREFUL OF: drugs, alcohol, prostitues, gambling, ... This can fuarrrk up your life that you will regret being alive (or so I heard). However, I would consider doing some kind of authentic ayahusca retreat. I heard a lot of good about that.

Then I would start to really consider the future. I'd read a ton of book and spend maybe a year or two really opening my horizon as much as possible with that question in mind: "what can I do to help myself and others at the same time?"

I'd love to go on kickstarter, patreon and support any project you want. That's a nice goal, it gets the money circulating but that's not enough.

Once you are grounded in your body, mind and are reasonable with your cashflow, then you can start consider building something for the ages. Don't do anything before a serious crossexamination though.

Anyway, never tell anyone about your exact wealth and get some accountability partner, maybe some kind of psychologist to make 100% sure you are not going insane. People who won the lottery usually ends up in a worst place than they were before. Take that as a warning, people get mad with money.

Let me repeat that point, consider that this money can be the worse thing that will ever happen to you. Do everything you can not to get overwhelmed by it.

So in summary: diversify your wealth, get some accountability partner (I recommend a personal coach/psychologist), travel a lot, take care of your mind, take care of your body and health, widen your intellectual horizons, become the best person that you can be for yourself and for others simultaneously.

I wish you the best life possible but be careful not to get crushed by going there too fast.

I hope you found that useful. If you don't mind, there are always a few books that I want to buy. I cherish the idea of being able to possess The Collected Works of C.G. Jung


I'd back the "donate to free software projects" thing. If you are not lying you could very likely fund some nice stuff for the masses. Also, as the person before said, don't tell people in meatspace at all. They will crawl out of the walls to try and scam you out of your cash. Not even your family. Keep any purchases below the table to everyone except the IRS.


I haven't eaten a good meal in a while so if you're feeling generous...



Also, I'm sure you're aware of this, but don't cash out all at once unless you're deliberately trying to crash this metaphorical plane. If you're accurate that's a small but not insignificant amount.


isn't 1000000BTC like 5% of all bitcoins out there?



Slightly more than that at the current market size.

It's doubtful this person just 'found' that.


Seems like a lot, better safe than sorry - spare a dime, lain


Since we're talking about windfalls, do you guys know anyone in person who got absurd amount of money?



As much as I relate, can we not turn this into a 4ch bitcoin beg thread until they at least say they might do that?



Lain you don't stay rich by giving your money away, think carefully about how you'd like to make an impact and then devote your funds to that. A good example is the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, they spread their funds around liberally but they don't just give it to everyone that asks you understand what I mean bruv. But also I think you should but everyone on Lainchan a Thinkpad....


it's irresistible, eh?


here's some tips and trivia about winning a lottery. just reading it makes me very anxious


Welcome to the Billionaires Boys Club!
With that kind of money you can make a killing with HFT, especially in the forex markets and futures.

Now seeing as you're sitting on a cozy sum, you should look into moving the funds you wanted to place in cold storage to a cc which offers actual anonymity properties such as XMR being the safest bet, or ZEC being a slightly risky endeavor, to ensure the utmost highest levels of privacy and no chainanalysis gets you got.

For all those giving financial advice (buy gold, convert all to fiat, buy cars), what even?
We don't want another lain feeling the heat.


Well, if you want to you could give me some btc!


Anything will do honestly, I would just buy LSD or something similar and you would get my eternal love and possibly pictures of me crossdressing (if you want to)



if you are feeling generous


i believe it's a million usd worth of btc


If only this were true, but might as well.


This is the first time I post something in a remotely related bitcoin beg thread. My father died of cancer and I'm essentially homeless now. Anything that could keep me from, you know, jumping off a bridge is appreciated.


consider >>29158 's proposal: buy the most successful company you can and turn it into a worker cooperative.

also consider donating it to lains who are in a fix in this thread -
et al.

myself included, I need to pay for uni
also you can send me a small amount to confirm that you had a windfall. I trust you because it's lainchan, but just to make sure


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If you would be so kind, I need help with uni fees.
I also wish to help my Dad out, he's in extreme debt due to old child support and court payments and is obese and depressed. His job is slowly killing him but he can't afford to quit. It kills me to see him waste away. I need your help anon.



my life just is like kicking dead whales down the beach, employless since longer time and i have depression, maybe also autism but undiagnosed


Don't give it to anyone who is under the impression you are filthy rich.



I have a bitcoin gambling problem. Also I'm involved with developing an aggregator site and we need money to pay for non-soykaf Cloudflare and a better hosting provider.


I'll add that people devolve into animals as soon as they see an opportunity to improve their lives dramatically.
This is all fine and good in life/death situations etc. but you don't want to be dealing with this day in day out or setting a precedent for dealing with it at all. Look at this thread for example, even in a civilised place like Lainchan where identity is abstract and rarely relevant it's post after post of BTC begging.
You do not want the general public to do this to you ever.



Haiku didn't meet it's funding goal... and it's dope.




thank you lain, you shine a bright light of wisdom in this hall of feral lainons


Yes. Its depressing af to see that there's more beggars here than genuine suggestions.

Kinda hoping OP just played us to prove a point in how low people will stoop, even in this high regarded area of the wired.


I don't know much about finance things, but >>29160 sounds like solid advice.

Well, Musk started with a billion and managed to build the most successful car startup and seems to be on track for getting a human on mars. But unless you're really confident, that's probably too big an ask.
Isn't the sole reason behind Canonical/Ubuntu's existance basically some rich fuarrrk who didn't know what to do with his money? You could start something like that. A sane Linux distribution, with Cubes OS security, Nix package management, a UI designed by people who know something about UI, decent marketing campaign behind it, etc.
Fund whatever entity is responsible for GPL enforcement, I heard they are in dire need of funding.
From my point of view, anything that serves the public good is worth investing into, whether that be software, vidya, green technology, or similar.

I agree with >>29185 and >>29189 and would like to express utter contempt for everybody who posted their bitcoin adress in here, particularly >>29184 who's openly admitting to gamble the money away.


can you tx it, so it shows up in the blockchain? not that i don't believe you or anything Present Day, Present Time! AHAHAHAHAHA!


Did I hear rich in bitcoin? BEGIN THE BEGGING!


Help me kick off my professional poker career Lainon.

Or like, I don't know, buy some nice soykaf and donate a bunch. The important thing is to have fun with it and try not to regret anything that happens. Keep in mind that the other day you didn't have this money and if it were to go away you'd be no worse off than you were. Money creates problems, but if you play it smart and safe you can avoid most of them.

Definitely don't keep it all in bitcoin btw, that's just asking for trouble. Maybe find a financial advisor.


i like the end capitalism one!


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donate some of it to the FSF and spend the rest on drugs


Hire a financial advisor.

>The body was too short or empty.


I'd like an explanation. How rich is OP? How the fuarrrk can you get rich by finding an old laptop? Security mnemonic?

I never read much about digital currencies, so this thread gikves me a huge question mark.


if you have never heard of cryptocurrencies before forget about the idea of becoming rich by finding an old computer


OP, reading what you said just made my left leg go numb. Some of the other suggestions in this thread are pretty good. I'm going to say that if you do decide to do some charity please consider setting up something like Virginite sans Frontieres, a NEET collective basically. As one human to another, I am glad you did not have to be a dog eat dog capitalist to get rich. For good or ill, I hope that you really are a billionaire and that you enjoy it to the fullest. I sincerely wish you the best (you don't need my lousy good luck!). I'm sorry if that sounds like I'm trying to "live vicariously through you," but if I haven't turned you off yet: when you drink a glass of fine wine or whatever, could you toast me (Anonymous)? If you read this, thanks.


Didn't mean to imply that. Was just slightly curious.


/liecht board anyone?


Donate to a charity, or crowdfund stuff you like... Or open up a comune...


bitcoin is a digital currency, which is created by some computational method by computers over the whole world, and the rate of production varies greatly. In its infancy, creating new bitcoins was relatively trivial, and they were worth almost nothing. Apparently OP was active in bitcoin production back then (or bought a large amount), as he now has a million of them laying around (or at least claims so). Looking at http://www.coindesk.com/price/, a bitcoin is worth just a bit above 1000 dollars at the time of writing, meaning OP is a billionaire now.


Or an anarchist syndicate.


>In its infancy, creating new bitcoins was relatively trivial, and they were worth almost nothing. Apparently OP was active in bitcoin production back then (or bought a large amount), as he now has a million of them laying around (or at least claims so).
Oh, that seems reasonable. Thanks for the explanation.


What's (not) hilarious, OP's BTC will cost less and less when he will be exchanging them for USD.


I wonder, is generating post-bitcoin cryptocurrencies any worth?
Those clones are never going to cost more than Bitcoins, so, maybe it's just useless to join them?


>I wonder, is generating post-bitcoin cryptocurrencies any worth? Those clones are never going to cost more than Bitcoins, so, maybe it's just useless to join them?


Not that Lainon, but I have the same question. Is it worth mining something like Litecoin/Dogecoin/XMR now, or is it too late to get in on cryptocurrency at this point? I've never done any mining, so I have no idea.


The replies suggesting
>use all that money against capitalism
>use all that money to make a moneyless community
>donate it to anarchy jk
are funny.
Silly lainons, all you need is eachother <3

OP should obviously buy true friends, sincere love and real knowledge.

I think most lainons don't actually believe that OP's telling the truth, I think he'd be getting a lot more advice if he said that he has 10000 btc wat do or something like that.


DOGE is fun but worthless.
LTC will do nothing, if you want a ROI.

Its not too late to join any of the zclassic, zcash and monero pools as they're all profitable with the right equipment and cheap electricity.
My miners are locked on to zclassic, with a hashrate in tens of thousands, colo'd in Asia.

If you want rough estimates, https://whattomine.com/coins.


Whatever you do with it, remember to pay your taxes on any purchases and on any cash you convert from BTC to fiat. We do not need a bitcoin baron having his assets seized and going to prison.


>"I found a million BTC"
>Desperate Lainon post their wallets
>Only 1/2 of them running TOR, VPN, or on public WIFI
>Wallets now linked to users' home IPs

Nice data gathering thread, NSA


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˙ ʟ˙ ˙ ʟ˙ ˙ ʟ˙ ˙ ʟ˙ ˙ ʟ˙ ˙ ʟ˙


Ok lads, I bought something really very very big. I'm gonna change the world.


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OP detected. Now tell us already. If you're not gonna tell us, at least tell Lain.


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You heard 29282.
Lains waiting...


Hey OP. I just got fired and had the worst day in my life. So if you wanna hire a hitman and fuarrrking kill me I'd be so grateful.


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>all the new users ITT
I am disinclined to believe you, OP


I find this more interesting as a thought experiment more than i actually believe op


>>probably the richest man in the world
What is suspension of disbelief?


OP should do a couple favors to the anons at that scam suicide thread.


I bought a transcontinental company.


Scout the world over for the very best hackers, make total destroy,


1) buy us some Thinkpads
2) invite Stallman to an European congress
3) buy Lainchan


Oi lads, I forgot to say something important. I'm Scot


>invite Stallman to an European congress
Question is, what European country needs Stallmans blessing the most?

Well that was quick? Doesn't transferring ownership of a company take more than just a couple of days, which is coincidentally the age of this thread?


It's not completed yet, I have to sign a goddamn pyle of papers


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Do you know the source on this image??



Wandering Island - Kenji Tsuruta